Divorce is challenging for a couple, but consider when children are involved. The effects of divorce on children can be long-lasting and traumatic, which is why it is crucial to involve your children in the conversations that matter. However, when discussing custody, it is best if children are not forced into a situation where they must pick who they will live with.

While divorce is hard enough on biological children, consider the trauma for adopted children. As an adoption lawyer i from a firm like Taylor Law & Mediation, PLLC can explain, many adopted kids (especially if adopted as children) will have memories of foster homes and feelings of not belonging. To avoid any old wounds from festering, they must understand that both parents still love them and want only what is best for them.

For the parents, from a legal standpoint, adopted children are no different from biological children. A custody arrangement will still need to be made. The parents will need to determine whether they will share custody or not. No parent has a stronger legal tie to the children, even if one is the biological parent. 

When Biology Matters

If you marry a person with children and those children have two biological parents in the picture, you likely have no legal ground for custody. To be considered the legal parent of a child, you must adopt them, and to do so, the biological parents must give up custody. You can talk with a lawyer to find out if there are any exceptions to the standard rules, but it is unlikely.

Making Custody Arrangements Work

While it can be difficult to make a shared custody arrangement because no parent wants to give up access to their children for days on end, it is necessary to create balance for your kids. One shared custody method that seems to work for many families is a shared family home. 

The way a shared home works is by creating a primary house where your children live and stay. The parents then find an apartment outside of the home. It is the parents that must travel back and forth instead of the children. This arrangement works because it provides your kids with a stable environment.

Are you preparing for a divorce? Do you have adopted children? If so, contact a local divorce attorney to discuss your options and legal rights. Remember, an adopted child is your child, and in the eyes of the law, there is no difference between them and a biological child.